One of his Central Lines blocked up on us this week. Repeated attempts to get it flowing again failed and the call was made to pull it. He's due to go under for his routine Spinal and Biopsy in another two weeks, but they feared infection before then. He sailed through the 20 minute procedure, as usual. Dealing with only one line is almost as much a relief as having the opportunity to watch one site heal... I can't help but latch on to and treasure the false feeling of being that much closer to the end.
My stomach churns when I think of all that his little body is going through to eradicate this monster. Before he is one year old, he will be older than I am. There are those who rage that traditional medicine is an unnecessarily toxic method of battling cancer, that a better way to go about it is to build the body up nutritionally. While every fibre of my being screams at what's being done to him, my rational wizard knows there's nothing we could have done better to avoid this situation to begin with. I can't, from our experiance, lend credence to the whole "build from within" approach. Additionally, this type of Leukemia doesn't give us time for such a laid-back action plan. It hits hard and fast, and so must we.
I often have the sensation of jumping off a cliff without my eyes.
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A parent must do what they feel is the best course of treatment for their child.
ReplyDeleteI've been reading about other methods and more natural options. If faced with a decision about our infant child we would probably opt the same route you are.
If it was a decision for myself at this point of my life I don't know.
I am just so sorry your family has to go through this.
Love ya,
Garoleen
Hailie, once again you have brought us into your world in such a beautiful, articulate way. Thank you for sharing your deepest, darkest with us.
ReplyDeleteWhen faced with these seemingly insurmountable life challenges, all we can possibly do is pray that the choices we make result in the best possible outcome. Maybe when Kaleb is an old man, he will be pleased to see that these aggressive types of childhood cancers are irradicated with no more than a vaccine. Wouldn't that be nice? But for now, my dear Hailie, we do what we can, we fight as hard as we can and we celebrate the victories, no matter how small.
Hugs and kisses, Janelle