Another Me Post

Don't know if you guys prefer or bemoan these posts, but it is my cathartic blog, after all. I have the power.

I've always been one to self-analyze to the point of nausea.

I recently had a new client find their way to my grooming salon. She was very terse over the phone, boarderline rude. I was grouching right up til she arrived, whereupon I put on my business face. I met her drama with a calm and firm lack of fluster. I was neither cowed, apologetic (I had nothing to be sorry for), nor was I bubbly. Amazingly, this diffused the storm immediately and seemed to almost relax her. Extenuating circumstances had her staying during the course of her dog's spa treatment. Conversation started out very sterile and polite but quickly progressed to the meat and potatoes. She'd battled and won not one but FOUR rounds with cancer. While I may not agree with her coping style, I could certainly understand it. Before my very eyes, as I related our own experience in my very matter-of-fact, what is just simply IS style, she melted into the friendliest little puddle.

This entirely new experience in customer relations has shone the light on my own encounters with people. I could clearly see that it was my lack of emotional reaction that helped her to unwind and find a stronger support. For myself anyway, all those flowery words of sympathy and pity puts me more on guard... as though such a cloud of fluff would drop me like a stone should I try to stand or lean on it. I myself used to vomit such an effusion upon hearing of someone's own great trial and tragedy, all the while edging away and subconsciensly hoping it wouldn't trigger some mystical karmic force of contagiousness. How awful to admit that about one's self, to discover that about one's self. Upon reflection, I was always ashamed of this response, even as I slinked away. I now realise what all The Initiated realise; to expend that much energy on emotional displays is to compromise the conquering of that mountain set before you. You are quickly stream-lined into a more efficient processing machine or you fail. Similarly, if you're obligated to drag someone wailing and flailing up over that mountain, you're going to fail. Much better to have an equal partner who knows how to boost as well as how to bounce off your boost.

I find myself relieved to be able to now offer an "I hear ya, Sister." I've faced a level of fear I didn't know I could feel, much less overcome. I am STRONG ENOUGH. Strong enough to do it again. Strong enough to stand with those who may need me in any capacity through their own journey.

I am battle-ready BUT I am also softened, so as to enjoy what pleasures and joys are before me now. More than ever, I appreciate the importance of cherishing of what is precious and good RIGHT NOW. We have so so much to be grateful for.